LOST!

My photo
Sonderborg, Denmark
I'm not here at all. Consumed by the demands of life, Lost in the swirls of doom. I am a shadow that had dissapeared. All that is left is an echo, not all can hear.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Tears for a friend



“I am sorry” she said for the last time.  It held the pain of a lifetime.

She sat cross legged on the bed, talking in whispers. It was quiet night. Too quiet.  If you listened you could hear the hearts breaking. Not the loud shatter of glass on a cold floor. Slowly, like soggy pieces of cardboard that could no longer keep it together. Drenched with midnight tears from her, silent pain from him, crushed dreams, and soiled memories. It was quiet.  So quiet, you could hear that.

Across the bed, he sat staring at her, saying nothing. He never did. For the last time, she did not complain. Did not compel him to reach out and say something. There was nothing left to say today. She saw the hurt and pain in his eyes. She knew exactly how he felt.The pain and regret in those eyes, trapped within, it would suck on his soul forever. She wished she did not know him so well.

He held her hand, a touch light as air, shook his head, a sad smile on his lips and let go.  In that moment she knew he had accepted the truth.


They looked at each other and wept. They wept for all that could never be. The broken promises and unshaped dreams. They wept, each for a friend and his broken heart.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

LILACS....

lilacs
Image copyright http://www.highaperture.com/l/i/lilacs/lilacs-40.html

This post is a response to An Obscure optimist's post here. http://expressmyway.blogspot.dk/2013/04/hell-hiker-16.html Thanks Yamini Ma'am.. I had fun doing this :)


The task that she has set is simple. You go to http://www.poetryinternationalweb.net/pi/site/poem/item/19823 and choose a poem in a language you do not understand. Edit the poem by moving around the words, using just the sound of the words to create something that makes poetic sense to you. Resist the urge to know what the words really mean. Now run your version of the poem through a translator.. Lo and behold!!! You are in mumbo jumboo poetry land!!


I chose this Norwegian poem SYRIN (click on title to go to original poem), just because I saw the word Kafka in it. Moved the words around to make this:

SYRIN
Franz Kafka, Wien 1924
Kafka at Etter
opp hadde rettet 

Sultekunstner En før Dora for ut men
etter for å lete Ville hun han at blomstene

Lukten av skulle kjenne skriblet var det at han
før det ble for seint,på en lapp at han

Kjenne lyst på vann, vanvittig hadde fått sånn, 
strømme forbi det oppspiste,gigantiske munner vann

Strupehodet, vel vitende om at døende ikke 
vann drikker, blomster men at bare enkelte 

Drikker idet ,å snakke om syrinene for ikke ,
de dør, som fortsetter også etterpå å drikke!


This is what the translation looks like...



LILACS
Franz Kafka, Vienna 1924


After that Kafka,

up had directed.

Hunger Artist A before Dora but for the,

for to look Would she he the flowers.

The smell of scribbled would know it was that he,

before it was too late, in a note that he.

Knowing fancy water, insane had been like that,

flow past it-eaten, giant mouths water.

Larynx, knowing that dying is not,

drinking water, flowers but that only certain.

Drink as, to talk about lilacs not,the door, 

which will continue thereafter to drink!



Foolishly enough, I expected it to make more sense, or have a better rhythm...

Try it! Its fun. Would love to see your attempts in the comments :)

Friday, May 10, 2013

Insulting you, you scum!







I do not possess any rights on the image.Taken from : 


I know, every opinion matters
But, does it? Does it really?
Talking, discussion, arguments, debates
You  take that shit seriously?

There must be a cheat code somewhere?
One that annihilates anybody who defies me
Off with his head, disappear with a poof!
To anyone who dares say “I disagree!”

Instead, I must unearth a string of thought
Damn, civil society, I must prove my worth
Measure and analyze my every word
Consistent with all logic on face of this earth

Or, maybe, denial is the key, the way to be!
Surely I know better than you, Mr. Gyaani
I have seen and lived in the real world, Sir, that,
counts for much more than your fancy degree!

My thoughts are playing a symphony of their own
While yours are beating their own lousy drum.
I smile vaguely, nod my head , look like I care,
In my mind, remember, I am insulting you, you scum!

- Suvarna

Monday, June 4, 2012

Are you Rajesh Koothrapally?

Image Copyright : CBS
I am in Denmark for almost 5 months now and I still get the weirdest questions asked about India.I was conducting a workshop about Indian culture for a group here, which was supposed to be strictly about work related culture issues between Indians and Danes, but we ended up taking about arranged marriages(what else?),alcohol, vegetarianism(another firang favorite), divorce, children out of wedlock and what not.

What I sadly realized was that most of the world still only knows us as "That country from Slumdog Millionaire"(Aaaargh!!! Danny Boyle, Do I love thee or hate thee!) Whats worse most of our deep ingrained beliefs, customs and rituals only seem to add to the twisted idea of our Land of Snake Charmers.

" Is it true that you have Snakes in your backyards" Lets face it, sometimes we actually do :P I only wish they were pet snakes like the whole world thinks they are. (Background score running in my mind: "Pata hai kal hamare ghar me ek saap nikla!, Beta Barsaat me paani me mat jaana, usme Saap ho sakte hain)

"Can you tell us about the caste system? Does that mean that our Bosses are higher beings than us?" Hahha.. Some of them might think they are, but I don't think I can get away by blaming it on the caste system.

"Do you still stay with your parents? Is it true that your parents think you have never touched alcohol in your life?" I'm sure they don't, but we'd rather not discuss that with them, would we?

"We never tell our children that we eat Candy. They hide it from us too.." That cracked me up, Our Alcohol is their Candy :P

Oh! So you are vegetarian. Does that mean you only eat VEGETABLES?? What do you eat for a meal then, just veggies? I cannot but imagine myself being compared to a Rabbit or an Elephant, in the jungles of India surviving on Ghaas Phoos! Koi inko South Indian/Gujju/Marwadi veg khana khilado..

But the best one came from an American colleague." You know Rajesh Kootrapally from The Big Bang Theory? Is it really like that for you?"  I had to take  a moment to answer that one. The adorable Brown guy in Pasadena. His weird parents(whats with his mother's hairdo???), spunky sister and random quotes from Bhagvat Geeta/Kamasutra. Is that real??? HAhahah.. Maybe yes, maybe not. If I strip away all the over the top stuff they add for sake of comedy, I do believe the makes of The Big Bang Theory have the character of their Indian guy spot on! And how adorably at that :) I would like to think we really are Rajesh Kootrapallys of the world (minus the exaggerations, of course)

What do you think?



Sunday, June 3, 2012

Coming back

I have neglect this space for so long, I'm wondering if it even makes sense to come back. For long I have told myself that I had no time for writing anymore.  That I have been sucked into the mundane corporate and was too busy climbing the ladder of life to find time for writing. But when you are spending an average of 6 hours a day on YouTube and another 7 sleeping, you know that's a lie.

But I have strong reasons to come back, Not just the shame and guilt I feel from reading blogs and thinking -" I used to do that too". Not just the encouragement from friends who have continued to write despite all odds. Something stronger, more intense that comes from within.

First, a quick update- I have since the last time I wrote, earned my first real salary ever.I say real, because its not my first paycheck. My first was a Rs 100 cheque from All India Radio and still remains my most prized earning :) I have moved thousands of kilometers from the only country I had ever know, traveled to 3 more, committed to marriage in the near future, gained 15 kgs, then lost 4(sigh!). Some of them, things I never thought I would do in my life.

Which brings me to why I felt the need to write again. I was attending a colleague's pre-wedding party and we got around to how and where I had met my soul mate. I was talking about things that happened about 5 years ago, stuff I hadn't talk about in a really long time. when I did talk, I felt like this was another person altogether, not me, that I was talking about.

Was it really me who had fought wars with my parents over letting me play music while I studied for an exam, Stayed up all night to write something that just could not wait until morning. I wore my elder male cousins clothes to a new year's party. Skipped a job opportunity because organizing a Rock Show was more important, devoured 4 books a week and thought the Library was unfair in not letting me borrow more.Was that really me? Or is this the real me? The one I am now. The one who hasn't really tuned in to music for over 2 years now, not picked up a pen or hand an original thought in over an year, can tell the difference between men's and women's sneakers, thought only about my career for an whole year now, had about 6 half-read books in her room that just might not be touched again.

I dare add that I am very happy in where I am in life. (which is kind of scary. Low standards, anybody?) Really, I am doing things that make me happy and am looking forward to so much more in life. But it is also true that I miss parts of my old self. A healthy balance of the old and new wouldn't hurt anyone. Would it?

So here I am at 3:20 in the morning, music blaring in the background, and a new post. Does being slightly drunk and very hungry have a hand in it, I wonder! I guess this is what they call growing up(really??? I am not so sure about the slightly drunk part now) Then again, maybe, maybe I am just high on life...

That's always a good thing. ain't it? :)


P.S: I hereby take upon myself a vow to continue writing here.Also I hope get better at this stuff. Therez limits to how long anybody can take all this super sentimental brain dumping on blogosphere! Right?

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Human, are you?!

There are tones of instances in my life when people have pointed it out to me that I am not human.
I have, every single of those times, taken pride in the fact that I indeed am not. Lately I have been alone a lot and have had an opportunity to not interact with people. I never thought I would say this, but I have started cherishing my time away from humans. There are times I go out of my way to avoid human contact...

I stay in a place full of mature, professional individuals..

Yet,

 Never does a day go by when these humans are not poking their noses into others business..
Most of them never shy away from saying hurtful things to others just to show who has the upper hand
Almost everyday, complex plans are drawn up to manipulate a fellow human for personal gain

And, every single one of them is proud of the steps they take everyday to make their lives easy and be called successful humans...

Boy! Am I glad I am not human!!!

P.S : This is one of the rare times that I'm posting unedited stuff on the blog. I hope that doesn't really show :)

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Life cycle..

Sleep
Eat
Chat
Sleep
Eat
Watch movies
Chat
Eat
Play Carrom/ Table tennis/cricket/football/badminton/Take a Walk
Chat
Party
Sleep

That's the life cycle over 200 post graduate (well, almost!) students, ages 21 to 28, full of energy and just waiting to take on the world...
What a waste of resources..
I'm really troubled.. isn't anybody else??

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Change...

We all have fantasies as kids. Not big dreams that one follows all her life. I'm talking about those small, little things that most of us grow out of, or forget or replace with more practical and often mundane things in life...

When I was a kid I always wished to ride a dog.
That was till I was told that at my age, Horses and Men were the only things worth riding ;)
Rode a Yak at 13 though :P

I remember the days when I would be up by 6 in the morning, tuning my tambora for riyaz
Now I am bleary eyed at 8, barely make to the class by 9
Besides, my friends throw things at me when I sing.

I used to think that holding hands and feeling the togetherness is what keeps a relationship going
That was before speed dial #2 on my cell became THE companion for two full years
Now we have all our major conversations on the phone, after we have met for the day  :P

When internet connectivity from home was a novelty,
I would stay awake the whole night, chatting up strangers
Now I avoid talking to half the people I meet in a day

My brother and I were mates for life, I thought
Now we meet once a year, for a week, tops
We can still chat the night away (except that he hates cell phones :P)

There were friends who I thought would be the desi versions of my bridesmaids some day
When we cross paths now, I look the other way
From some, I still receive wedding invitations and baby pictures in the mail :)
(super cute baby pictures, I might add)

I would look out the window, see a stranger and wonder how his life was connected to mine
well, I still do that sometimes,
I guess some things never change.....

And thank god for that :) :) :)

Monday, September 6, 2010

Coffee Conversations and Marketing

What was born in early April as an aspiration of the students of the Marketing batch, culminated in “Coffee Conversations and Marketing” the Marketing seminar held at Symbiosis Institute of International Business on the 27th of August 2010, in association with IAMAI (Internet and mobile association of India).  Revolving around the concept of moving towards a stimulated, conversational, form of marketing from the traditional, broadcasting mediums, the day-long event aimed to understand the importance of new age mediums of Marketing communication and their implications on Marketing as we know it.

The day started with Mr Debashish Mitra, Director, Sales & Marketing, Mercedes-Benz India highlighting the importance of a 360 degree approach to marketing, especially in the luxury products segment. 

The favourite of the audience was Mr Kiruba Shankar, CEO Business Blogging, who won over the hearts of the audience with his exuberance and enthusiasm. His experiences about the importance of digital communication and social networking as tools of marketing  had the students alive with a will to do the same . 
Also speaking on the occasion was Mr. Purnendu Kumar, Associate Vice President, Technopak who enlightened the students about challenges faced by organised retail. He gave rare insights on the ways in which unorganised retail can pose a threat to organised retail and the learning to be derived from it.

 The last speaker for the day was Mr. Rajiv Dingra, Founder & CEO, WATConsult. This 25 year old CEO, struck quite a chord with the students with his light hearted but practical talk about niche blogging and the era digital of Marketing.
The lecture series was followed post lunch by a panel discussion on “The changing trends in marketing: will the old tricks still work”.  Vishal Sharma CEO, ithink Labs and Ratan K K, founder associate, Gutsgo e-marketing joined Mr. Dhingra and Mr. Shankar for the panel discussion moderated by Mr. Prithwiraj Ghorpade. A jam packed auditorium was witness to the witty and rich churning of ideas that followed. The panel threw light on the importance of accountability in Marketing, and the increasing reach of digital media for communication.
The event was organised by the students of Marketing, 09-11 batch under the able guidance of Ms. Adya Sharma, Faculty SIIB, who also proposed the vote of thanks. The attendees included students from Symbiosis Institute of International Business, SCMHRD and SCIT besides members of faculty and invited guests from across Pune.
The sponsors and associates for the event were WATblog.com: online media partner, St Laurn suites: Hospitality partner, Dare2Compete: Official B School partner, Mytra: Merchandise Partner and Thought Labs: Software Partner.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Tiger!

I remember watching the trailers for the movie "Kaal" and being awed. Not to see SRK or the story line, (I have to say that the movie sucked to the core) but to see the king of the jungle in all his splendour.
I remembered the roar of the lone Tiger from the nearby zoo that woke me up as a kid.
I remembered my English teacher Mrs Ratna Bannerjee teach me the only 24 lines in the world that have been able to do any justice to the beauty of this stately beast.
There really is no point trying to describe what I felt. Just watch a tiger walk alone in the middle of jungle, not a care in the world, owning the world (Visit You tube now!) and you'll know why exactly Wordsworth uses the line "Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?" to end his poem.
For the only 24 lines worthy of a Tiger, read on...................
TIGER ( by William Wordsworth)
TIGER, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what distant deeps or skies
Burnt the fire of thine eyes?
On what wings dare he aspire?
What the hand dare seize the fire?

And what shoulder and what art
Could twist the sinews of thy heart?
And when thy heart began to beat,
What dread hand and what dread feet?

What the hammer? what the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? What dread grasp
Dare its deadly terrors clasp?

When the stars threw down their spears,
And water'd heaven with their tears,
Did He smile His work to see?
Did He who made the lamb make thee?

Tiger, tiger, burning bright
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?

P.S: No matter how many times I read these lines, they always give me the goosebumps. not out of fear, but sheer respect for the king of the jungle. Its a pity there are only 1141 of them left in the world. Do your bit to save the Tiger. Respect the perfection of the maker... "Did He smile His work to see? "